Life planning: Wait, what?!

So we go to elementary school, then middle school, then high school, then [usually] college, then we graduate, get big boy/girl jobs, get married, have babies, and live happily ever after....right?

HA. Not at all, folks...

Ok, I guess some people end up doing that. And good for them, if they've got their lives figured out at such a routinely convenient age. But then there's the rest of the us who have no freaking clue what we want to do with our lives. We have no clue where we want to go. I say we because I know I'm not alone in this feeling.

But seriously. I'm graduating in under two months and I have no clue what is going to happen! When I was a special education major, my plan was exactly the one I started this post with. I was going to student teach and get a full time teaching job easily, etc. But now... I feel like I have no goals. I'm so checked out of school right now. I need to just finish it off, but it is getting to be more and more difficult to find motivation to do that! I think I want to be a counselor. But I can't actually do that until I have a Master's degree. And I can't get a Master's until I can afford it. And I can't afford it until my undergrad debt (heaps and heaps of it) is paid off. And the undergrad debt can't get paid off until I have a [good enough] job. And I can't have a good enough job until I get experience...and so on, and so on. *sigh* What a cycle, right?

Kayla and I were just talking about this today, how it's crazy that people/ society/ culture expects people to just automatically know what we want to do "for the rest of our lives"! That's ridiculous. How could anyone possibly know what they want in the rest of life when they're only 22/23 years old? There are still at least ~60+ years left in life to figure that out. Why do we have to rush it? Well, I guess because we have bills to pay and debt to pay off...and many times kids to take care of, bla bla bla.

Growing up and being the real world is so scary! I'm seriously going to miss the whole college environment. I won't miss the money, boring classes, tests, etc. But MAN, I'll miss seeing people I know everywhere- literally- everywhere I go, I know someone! I'll miss waking up late, and staying up late. I'll miss walking everywhere. I'll miss having spontaneous hang out times/ coffee/ lunch/ parties with people. It's so great! I'm so thankful for having met so many wonderful people here, and I hope to stay in touch with them for years and years to come as well. :)

So I guess for now...only time will tell what I'm supposed to do or where I'm supposed to go. First things first is finishing these damn classes... Ugh. :P So bored. Haha. Then I'll graduate. Then I'll be thrown into the real world. Eek!

“Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again." -- C.S. Lewis

“For, after all, you do grow up, you do outgrow your ideals, which turn to dust and ashes, which are shattered into fragments; and if you have no other life, you just have to build one up out of these fragments. And all the time your soul is craving and longing for something else. And in vain does the dreamer rummage about in his old dreams, raking them over as though they were a heap of cinders, looking in these cinders for some spark, however tiny, to fan it into a flame so as to warm his chilled blood by it and revive in it all that he held so dear before, all that touched his heart, that made his blood course through his veins, that drew tears from his eyes, and that so splendidly deceived him!” 
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

(all photos from my pinterest)

The Perfect Weekend

Hey all! I apologize [again] for lack of blogging... There's been a lot going on [again], so I haven't really been focused on blogging so much. But I do need to share my perfect weekend story with you all because it's just too much to hold inside!

It was easter weekend, so my friends and I drove up the Twin Cities. My Nepali friend Ravi and Sri Lankan friend Tasha were invited to stay with my family and I for the weekend to celebrate with us.

Friday

We drove up (leaving an hour later than I had wanted... shocking, I know :P) and jammed out to great tunes the whole way. We arrived to my house and were greeted by two new "members" of our family: my sister's friends Khushboo and Maneesha- who are also both from Nepal and Sri Lanka! We then all took off and went to the Mall of America, as Khush and Manee had never been there before. After that we dropped M, K, and E off at home; and Ravi, Tash, and I were off to see Trevor Hall in concert!

We got there early enough where we had time to buy merchandise...and since we were part of the first 100 people, we got to do a meet and greet after the concert! The music was blissfully perfect. I mean, his music is already perfect, but when it's live and you're a part of it? It's a million times better. We danced, drank, sang along...and touched him! He crowd surfed off the stage AND off the balcony of the theatre!!! And I got it on tape! It was perfect timing... I shoved my drink in Tasha's hands and immediately recorded his jump off the balcony. Haha... Words can't describe the happiness we felt after A) touching him on the way (only his hand/ leg, no worries :P) and B) precisely timing the recording of him jumping into the crowd. I also met a guy who was getting a tattoo just earlier that day at the SAME TIME as Trevor! So he was put on the guest list and joined us in the meet and greet afterwards.

{Ravi. Tasha. Mary. Me. Nick.}

We waited in line with these awesome [crazy] girls... and finally got to meet Trevor! I told him I liked his tattoos, he signed my poster, Tash hugged him and had him sign her shirt... It was so great. I really just love that man. So, so much. Nick (tattoo guy) invited us out to the bars afterward, but we ended up losing him in a crowd, so the [crazy, awesome] girls we met invited us to come with them to a different bar! We went; it was fun... Had some good talks with them, etc. Then we dropped Ravi off at his sister's house, and Tash and I went home...where we were greeted by friends and a rabbit. Ha, it was grand. I had seen Trevor in concert before, but even the second time- it was life changing. He is so inspirational and his voice- HIS VOICE! It's so magical. Mmm...

Saturday

Grandma and Grandpa Scott (B and B as we call them) came to town Saturday morning. Em and her friends went down to El Burrito Mercado, where they have authentic Mexican goodies, and they brought back this triple salsa sampler which consisted of medium, spicy, and crazy-spicy salsas. We all gathered around them with a GIANT bag of chips and annihilated ALL THE CHIPS AND SALSA. We were all dying (eyes watering, noses running, etc.) from the intensity of the salsas. It was delicious. We hung out for a while, then all the cousins came over and we had our annual easter egg hunt in the house... Unfortunately, my sister Lexi and Grandma miscounted the eggs so not everyone got the same amount... I ended up with just two eggs. :P Ha, but it was fun nonetheless... It's all about the experience not the material goods. (Even though I definitely stole some of my cousin's fruit snacks... Hehehe) After hanging out with the family, Tash, Khush, Manee and I went to the Nepali New Year celebration to watch Ravi dance and have delicious Nepali food! It was a tad on the boring side due to entirely too much talking and un-organization... but seeing Ravi dance (and meeting a new friend: the cutest little girl who fell in love with Tasha) was totally worth it!

{Happy family: post egg hunt}

{Red: Spicy} {Light green: Crazy-spicy} {Green: Medium}

{Cute little girl who fell in love with Tasha}

After the celebration, we headed off to Northfield for a party with some of my former high school classmates. We got some food on the way, and jammed out to tunes again (of course) in attempts to wake ourselves up for the party. It was about 10pm at this point, so you can see how we were tired. ;) We got there and I ended up realizing I had gone to school with basically everyone there! Ha, it was kind of a weird flashback. We had some drinks, played with bullets, guns, and military things, had a flood in the bathroom, had munchies, watched Archer before passing out around 3am or so. It was great. Totally worth the hour long drive out there!

{Tasha rockin' the chemical resistant military boots}

Sunday

We woke up bright and early to make the trek back home. It was an absolutely beautiful day out, so of course we took advantage of it! We played corn hole, basketball, velcro catch, took a million pictures, and listened to Trevor Hall ALL. DAY. It was so marvelous. We had some great laughs and memories... Really. Mom's side of the fam came over, we had some tasty food and talked. Then the highlight of the day: Americans vs. Asians basketball game. It was EPIC. There was a perfect amount of people: 5 people for the Asian team, and 5 people for the American team. We hardly kept score; got really intense about it; liked to yell things frequently such as, "REBOUND! REBOUND!" or "KOU!" or "AY, AY, AY!" None of us wanted to leave... Tash and Ravi fell in love with my (our) family; we took [literally] 315 pictures throughout the weekend. It was just perfect! Then we headed back to Winona while reminiscing all the memories we had shared and experienced. 

{Happy family in the sun}

~ BLISS ~

Something's Off...Do you know that feeling?

Do you know that feeling...

when you lose something, but you don't have any idea where it is?

when you're forgetting something, but you don't know what it is?

when you feel guilty about something, but you don't need to be?

when you're lost, and you can't find your way back to where you want to be?

when you want to say something to someone, but it's just not the right time to do so?

when you miss someone so much it hurts physically, psychologically, and emotionally?

when you have an urge to do something, but don't know how to go about doing it?

where you're just so overwhelmed with things, that all you can do to overcome it is to sit by yourself and cry for a while?

where all you want is to be optimistic, but pessimism keeps taking over?

where everyone is telling you a million things, and you don't know what your own feelings are anymore?

where it seems like everything you've ever wanted has come crashing down, and you don't know how to handle the new path in front of you?

Right now. All of these things are all I'm feeling. I don't know why. I don't know how. I need to fix it. I want it to change. It came out of nowhere. It's hard. I'm not sure how to handle it. So I'm venting here. Perhaps someone can relate? Anyone? Positive thoughts are welcomed.

xo

(source for all photos: pinterest)

Thrift stores vs. big ol' department stores

Hi blog loves!

Life's been a bit emotionally hectic over on this end, so I apologize for lack of blogging lately. I promise I haven't forgotten about this world and I will try my best to keep posting as much as possible!

So my friend and I went shopping at Target today, as she had to get a new shirt for a presentation she was giving. I remember when I could buy a sweater for $12 or so from there... Now they're all like, $20 or more?! What the heck!? I guess to most people this might not be expensive, and it probably isn't a shock. But I honestly can't remember the last time I paid full price for a brand new item of clothing.

Recently I've grown fond of shopping at thrift stores and consignment shops! Over spring break, Andrew and I went thrift store shopping all day and I had great success in my purchases. I think I spent less than $100 and I got multiple sweaters, shirts, skirts, and dresses... Talk about amazing deals! Plus, getting clothes used usually means it's not something everyone and their mom has. I hate dressing like everyone else. That just gets boring!

I know everyone has their own opinions on where they buy clothes, and if they want the expensive brand name stuff they will buy it. Which is totally fine! To each their own. I'm just so glad I have discovered the wonderfulness that is (well, I guess re-discovered because I have technically always known about them) thrift stores and consignment shops. I get compliments on every item of clothing I've bought secondhand; it's all super comfy; it's original and not usually something a lot of people own; and best of all IT'S CHEAP! I can't even imagine how much money I've saved from not buying brand new full priced clothes.

I mean sometimes it's "necessary" to buy something brand new, if it's an emergency or whatever. But I hardly even buy new clothes to begin with, so that's also a benefit for me. ;)

Goodwill, Savers, and small consignment shops are just my favorite places ever...

Where are YOUR favorite places to shop for clothes?!

Thank you, Kayla and internet words

Due to lack of words on how my life has been going lately... I am going to share my best friend Kayla's newest blog post with you all because I've got a lot going on and can't find the words or ability to express it in a blog post. Yet Kayla, and other people's quotes, surprisingly described things perfectly. So read it. Check it out. Everything in this is just... Yea. Perfection for now.

Please read. Here it is. :)